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When Everything Feels Heavy: Understanding Depression

9 min readEvidence-based
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Depression is a common mental health condition. It affects mood, energy, thinking, sleep and your ability to enjoy everyday life. It is more than a bad day or a sad patch after a disappointment. It lasts, and it can make ordinary tasks feel very heavy.

Some people feel sad or tearful. Others feel flat, numb, irritable or cut off. You may still be working and caring for others, while privately finding everything harder. Depression is not a sign of weakness or ingratitude. And it can be treated.

How common is depression?

The World Health Organization estimates that about 5% of adults worldwide live with depression. In Australia, a national survey found that 7.5% of people aged 16–85 had a mood disorder in the past year. Women were affected more often than men. Many more people have periods of low mood that don't meet a diagnosis but still deserve support.

What can depression look like?

A depressive episode involves low mood, or loss of interest or pleasure, most of the day, nearly every day, for at least two weeks. Other signs include:

  • Sleeping much more or much less than usual.
  • Changes in appetite or weight.
  • Low energy or feeling slowed down (or sometimes restless).
  • Trouble concentrating, remembering or making decisions.
  • Feeling worthless, very guilty or hopeless.
  • Pulling away from people and activities.
  • Aches and pains without a clear cause.
  • Thoughts of death or suicide.

Depression can look different in different people. In men, it may show up more as anger, irritability, risk-taking or drinking more. In young people, it may look like irritability, withdrawal or slipping at school. Older adults may notice more physical symptoms or memory problems.

A checklist can't diagnose depression. You don't need to wait two weeks, or meet any threshold, to ask for help.

Types of depression

  • Major depression: one or more episodes of the symptoms above.
  • Persistent depressive disorder: a milder but long-lasting low mood, most days for two years or more.
  • Perinatal depression: depression during pregnancy or in the year after birth. It can affect any parent.
  • Bipolar disorder: periods of depression that alternate with periods of very high or irritable mood and energy.

It is important to check for bipolar disorder before starting treatment. Some antidepressants, taken on their own, can trigger a high in people with bipolar disorder. If you have ever had periods of unusually high energy, little need for sleep or racing thoughts, tell your GP or psychologist.

Why does depression happen?

There is rarely one cause. The old idea that depression is simply a "chemical imbalance" is now seen as too simple. Instead, several things usually combine:

  • Biology: family history, hormones, long-term illness, pain and some medicines.
  • Thinking patterns: harsh self-criticism, going over and over problems, and perfectionism.
  • Life events: loss, relationship breakdown, loneliness, money stress, work pressure, trauma and big changes.
  • Lifestyle: poor sleep, inactivity and alcohol or drug use can both add to depression and result from it.

Depression can also feed itself. Exhaustion makes it harder to see people or get things done. The isolation and pressure that follow can deepen low mood. Understanding this cycle helps show where support can make a difference.

How is depression treated?

Effective treatment is available, even for severe or long-lasting depression. The right plan depends on how severe it is, your history and your preferences. Our psychologists often draw on three approaches: CBT, ACT and IFS. Each offers a different way of understanding depression, and many people benefit from a combination.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

CBT sees depression as a cycle between thoughts, feelings and actions. Low mood brings harsh thoughts, such as "I'm a failure" or "nothing will change". These thoughts drain energy, so you do less. Doing less means fewer good experiences, which deepens low mood.

In therapy, your psychologist might help you:

  • Rebuild activity gradually ("behavioural activation"), scheduling small tasks that bring a sense of achievement, connection or enjoyment. Steps are matched to your energy, not a test of willpower.
  • Notice unhelpful thinking patterns, such as all-or-nothing thinking or dwelling on the past.
  • Test harsh beliefs against the evidence, and find fairer, more balanced views.
  • Understand deeper beliefs, such as "I'm not good enough", and the experiences that shaped them.
  • Solve practical problems that are adding to stress.

If the thought "I'll only be a burden" stops you replying to a friend, you might look at that belief and plan one small step towards contact. A review of 409 trials found that CBT improves depression, and that benefits last after therapy ends.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

ACT sees depression as partly shaped by getting caught up in painful thoughts and pulling away from life to avoid pain. Thoughts like "there's no point" can feel like facts. Withdrawing may bring short-term relief, but life slowly loses meaning.

In therapy, your psychologist might help you:

  • Step back from heavy thoughts, noticing "I'm having the thought that I'm useless" rather than believing it.
  • Make room for sadness and other painful feelings, rather than fighting them.
  • Be present, using short mindfulness skills to reduce time spent ruminating.
  • Reconnect with your values: the kind of person, parent, partner or friend you want to be.
  • Take small committed actions guided by those values, even when motivation is low.

For example, if you value being a good friend, one step might be sending a short message, even while the thought "they don't want to hear from me" is there. In ACT, motivation often follows action, rather than the other way around. A review of 20 meta-analyses found that ACT helped with several conditions, including depression.

Internal Family Systems (IFS)

IFS sees the mind as made up of different "parts". Rather than seeing low mood as a flaw, IFS asks what your parts are feeling and what they are trying to do.

Some parts, called exiles, carry deep pain from experiences such as loss, rejection or criticism. They can hold burdens: heavy beliefs and emotions such as "I'm worthless", "I'm alone", sadness or shame. Other parts act as protectors. An inner critic might push you hard so you're never rejected again. Another part might shut down feelings and energy, so the pain doesn't break through. Another might reach for distraction. When protectors act in extreme ways, they can deepen the flatness, exhaustion and self-criticism of depression.

IFS also describes a Self: a core of calm, curiosity, compassion and clarity. In therapy, your psychologist might help you:

  • Step back from depressed or critical parts and notice them with curiosity.
  • Understand protectors, such as what the critic fears would happen if it stopped.
  • With their permission, comfort hurt parts and help them release their burdens.

This can bring more connection and harmony inside, so you feel less at war with yourself. IFS also attends to present-day losses and pressures.

Other effective options

Interpersonal therapy helps with relationship problems, grief and life changes. Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy can reduce the chance of depression coming back for people who have had several episodes. Medication can help, especially for moderate to severe depression. For some people, therapy and medication together work better than either alone. Talk to your GP or a psychiatrist about medication.

If the first approach doesn't help enough, that's a reason to review the plan. It doesn't mean recovery is out of reach.

Looking after yourself

  • Start small: pick one easy activity each day, such as a short walk, a shower or a text to a friend. Action often comes before motivation.
  • Move regularly: physical activity has clear benefits for depression.
  • Protect your sleep: keep regular bed and wake times where you can.
  • Stay connected: even brief contact can ease the pull towards isolation.
  • Go easy on alcohol: it can worsen mood and sleep.
  • Be kind to yourself: try speaking to yourself as you would to a friend.

Supporting someone with depression

You don't need to have the answers. Listen without judging. Avoid telling them to "cheer up". Offer practical help, gently encourage them to see their GP or a psychologist, and keep in touch even if they pull away.

If you're worried about their safety, ask them directly. Asking about suicide does not put the idea in someone's head. Look after yourself too.

Getting support at Invision Psychology

Our psychologists offer therapy for depression at our clinics in Rockhampton (2/72 Bolsover Street) and Yeppoon (3/26 James Street), and by telehealth for people across Central Queensland and beyond.

  • You don't need to know which therapy you want. Your first appointment is a chance to talk about what's happening and what you'd like to change.
  • Medicare: with a Mental Health Treatment Plan from your GP, you may be able to claim a Medicare rebate for up to 10 sessions each calendar year. See our fees.
  • NDIS: we work with self-managed and plan-managed NDIS participants.

Make an enquiry or call 07 5641 4888.

If you need help now

If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 000. For 24/7 support:

  • Lifeline: 13 11 14
  • Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636
  • 13YARN (Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people): 13 92 76
  • Kids Helpline (ages 5–25): 1800 55 1800

An appointment enquiry is not an emergency service.

About the author

Alex Parkes BPsychSci, GradDipPsych, MPsych, MAAPi
Founder and Principal Psychologist, Invision Psychology. Level 1 trained Internal Family Systems practitioner.

Published September 2026 · Last reviewed September 2026 · Next review due September 2027

This article gives general information based on published research. It is not a substitute for personalised advice from a qualified health professional.

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